Eve

This last Easter I was given a book by my mom called, "Eve And The Choice Made In Eden" by Beverly Campbell. I started reading it and then summer got in the way so it got neglected. I picked it up again about a month ago and couldn't put it down (which is a big deal for me because I have a hard time finishing church books). This was exactly the book that I needed to read. I whole-heartedly recommend that all women (and even men) read this book.

I've always had a hard time understanding the need for "the fall" and Eve's role regarding her decision to eat the fruit. I just felt like there was more to Eve than what you you read in the scriptures or learn about in the temple. I wanted to understand but wasn't sure how to. This book opened my eyes, helped me understand the necessity of "the fall", and most of all deeply appreciate what happened in the garden and how it applies to me today. I feel like I now gain so much more when I go to the temple. I understand more of what my role is, as a woman, in the gospel and how men and women are each given specific qualities that together create a symbiotic relationship. I know why Eve made her decision and I now can say that I love her for it! She was (and is) an incredible woman and is unfortunately so misunderstood. Most of the world have seen her actions as wrong and that she was disobedient. Instead it is quite the opposite. She made a huge sacrifice but she knew that it was what needed to be done. Together with Adam they stepped into the unknown, away from God's presence, because they loved us and were willing to give all of their comfort for the possibility of future generations.

I'm not going to go into much of what is in the book, but I did want to share a quote and poem that was near the end that really resonated within me. The poem, written by Beverly Campbell, was inspired by the following quote from President Howard W. Hunter. It reads, "As our Lord and Savior needed the women of His time for a comforting hand, a listening ear, a believing heart, a kind look, an encouraging word, loyalty--even in His hour of humiliation, agony, and death--so we, His servants all across the Church need you, the women of the church."

The poem:

"We Will Stand"

A hand reaches out.
A voice is heard.
A prophet's invitation-plea: "Come stand with us."
Type and shadow of another voice: "Come follow me."
Woman answers: "I will stand with you!"
"Woman has always stood," Echoes from corridors of time.

I am woman in the Garden--Mother of all living who
courageously partook that man might be.
I am woman at the stable--Who gently acquiesced that a
God-child might also be.
Will I stand?
Without question I will stand!

I am woman at the well--first to whom Jesus revealed
Himself as Messiah, anxious to alert others of identity divine.
I am woman-friend of Jesus--in whose home of faith the dead was raised,
disciples taught saving truths sublime.
Will I stand?
Could I do other than stand?

I am woman with the alabaster box--anointing the Savior unto His burial;
lone in recognition that crucifixion is near.
I am woman at the tomb--asked to deliver the glorious
message that a risen Christ did appear.
Will I stand?
Indeed, I will stand.

In the Garden
At the Cradle
By the Cross
Woman has always stood!

As a woman-disciple I will utilize my love, intellect, and
energy to strengthen my family and then the families of our society.

As a daughter-disciple I will see selflessness, sacrifice, and
compassion as traits of the Savior; I will focus on
righteousness, service, and wholeness.

As a sister-disciple, I will stand with and I will stand for
His beloved prophets and apostles, and with His
servants all across the Church, just as did my sisters
stand with the Savior, even in the hour of His
humiliation, agony, and death.

Out of my strength I will offer--
A comforting hand
A listening ear
A believing heart
An encouraging word
An unstinting loyalty
A partnership of trust

Will women stand?
To the last breath.
We will stand!

"If You're Going to San Francisco..."

Yes, we went to San Fran. No, we did not wear flowers in our hair. But we had a good time! Brad had to go their for business so Palmer and I tagged along with! It was great because Brad's company paid for his flight and food and our hotel stay (for part of the time- we extended the trip a bit). So it ended up on being a pretty good deal. The take-off on the airplane put Palmer to sleep both there and back which was a great thing. We pretty much did all of the usual touristy stuff and Palmer was a trooper! He did a great job staying in his stroller non-stop and always on the go. While Brad had meetings the first couple of mornings it worked out great because I was able to stay at the hotel for Palmer to get a good morning nap and then we would meet Brad downtown. The weather was constantly changing but isn't that how it always is in San Francisco? We sadly never got to see much of the bridge due to the fog. One of our favorite things did was we rented two bicycles and biked from Fisherman's Wharf, across the Golden Gate Bridge, and over to Sausalito. It was beautiful and warm over in Sausalito and the prettiest town. It feels like something on the French Rivera. While I love visiting San Francisco I would never ever want to live there. Too many hills, too many crazy people and morals, and disappointing California weather. It was fun to take a trip with just our little family!

Sterling & Ashley's Wedding

My brother Sterling got married to his high school sweetheart Ashley Alder. We couldn't be more excited to have her officially join the family. The wedding was a beautiful day and everything turned out wonderful. They were sealed in the Salt Lake Temple, had a wedding luncheon at the JSMB, and a reception in the courtyard at The Grand America. Ashley looked stunning and I was entirely jealous of her hair. The reception was absolutely beautiful and everyone felt like it was a wedding you see in the movies (we even got to have a mashed potato bar served in goblets!). They did a great job planning the wedding. They were both so happy and it will be fun to see them as newlyweds although I don't envy their schooling/financial situation. I am so grateful that Brad and I were engaged and married after we both graduated from college so we didn't have to do the whole "poor married college student" thing. Here are some pictures of the wonderful day!

California Here We Come!

We had our traditional Davis family vacation to California this year. Oh, how I love this trip. We get a beach house somewhere in Southern California (this year was Oceanside) and just relax, boogie board, read, take naps, eat good food, play games, and maybe take a day trip to a theme park (Disneyland usually). We go every 2-3 years and we've been doing it ever since I can remember. This year we went with the Glen & Janene Davis family for the last time because our families are just getting too big. We had a blast as usual! The weather unfortunately at the beginning of the week wasn't great. The ocean was warmer than the air! But by the end it was sunny & warm! We spent hours in the ocean and I got trampled by a few waves. We decided to leave Palmer with Brad's parents. We missed him terribly but it sure was nice to have a little vacation ourselves. He did great for them and it was fun for them to have some more bonding time together. Here are some pictures of the week!

Palmer at 6 Months

My sister-in-law, Rachel, and I took 6 month pictures of Palmer. They turned out pretty cute! These are some of my favorites:

Do I Miss Teaching?

Boy I feel like I get asked this question a lot. So I decided that maybe it was about time to write my feelings down on paper (err.. I mean on the world wide web). Besides I think it's probably good for me to sort out all of my feelings regarding this question. So below are the things that I do and don't miss about my past career.

What I Miss:
-Being surrounded by a whole bunch of adoring students. I even loved just walking down the hallway or in the cafeteria and children that I didn't even know come up and give me a hug or say hello. Makes you feel good!
-Seeing the excitement on a student's face when they finally grasped a difficult concept or they understood something new.
-Gaining 30 new friends/children each year. You grow pretty close to those students and I always had a hard transition into the next year because I didn't want to let go of "my kids".
-Teaching Social Studies (American History). I loved most subjects (except for writing) but Social Studies was by far my favorite. I loved the simulations, projects, and most of all the appreciation and pride for our wonderful country that I tried to instill in my students. They finally truly understood why we celebrated Independence Day and the sacrifices made for our rights today. So many students complain that history is boring- but it all depends on how it is taught and it made me feel good that I was doing my best to bring it to life.
-Working with adults- sometimes it gets a little dull around the house and I crave adult interaction. I loved talking with Ruth (the secretary) and Carolyn (my principal).
-Feeling like I was keeping myself educated. I hope to start attending some classes and such to not only keep up my license but to feel like I am still learning and expanding my own mind.
-The stricter schedule of my day. I think that because I had less time at home I probably used my time better. I would maybe say the stricter schedule to my year as well? It was strange when it turned to autumn last month because it was the first time in 20 years that I did not return to a school setting in the fall.
-The excitement of starting a new school year. I always had grand ideas of ways that I wanted to improve my classroom that next year. Most of them were forgotten by the third week of school when the craziness kicked in- but nonetheless it was exciting and motivating.
-Most definitely the paycheck. Not saying that I got paid well- but it's hard to see any of it go.
-Working with Amy Flynn (a fellow 5th grade teacher). She moved the year before I left so I don't know if this really counts but she definitely became a kindred spirit during hard times.

What I Do NOT Miss:
-The stress. There was always too much to do and not enough time. I always felt like I was letting something slip, but without devoting my entire life to teaching I had to let go at some point.
-Correcting papers. Grades. Report Cards. Oftentimes my evenings were ruined (and unpaid) trying to stay on top of grades.
-Parent Teacher Conferences. Enough said.
-Bad behavior or trying everything possible to motivate a student who could care less.
-Working with careless parents. It was heartbreaking to see some of my students fail purely because their parents didn't care.
-Working with some people that were impossible to please and inconsiderate to almost everyone around them. This was a biggie for me. When I get frustrated with Palmer I just remember what I could be dealing with and then I feel much better.
-Feeling inadequate. I knew I was a good teacher and my students scored well on end of year tests but I always felt like I was shorting them on something. Every teacher excelled in one or two categories. But I wanted to excel in all of them. Once again it comes down to the too much to teach and not enough time.

For the most part I just really don't even think about teaching. It almost seems like that was a whole different life of mine and now Palmer is my life. Do I wish I were back? Sure there are things that I miss and can't get in any other setting but for the most part I am happy with where I am right now. As I read through my list I realize that I still feel many of those emotions and can get those same highs & lows with just being a mom. I get to see the excitement on Palmer's face as he learns how to do a new trick. I get to have my child love and adore me every day (and of course I love and adore him right back). As my children grow up I can teach them the importance of our country, take them on field trips, and volunteer in their classroom. At the same time, I feel those feelings of inadequacy. Am I doing enough? It seems like some moms are so much better than I am but I have to remember that we all have our strengths and weaknesses. The stress of my day is different now but I still feel that there are so many things I would love to accomplish but somehow it just doesn't get done (make my own bread, become a better bargain/coupon shopper, study my scriptures more, exercise, etc.). I guess that's just life, huh?

Basically I loved teaching and I love being a mom, but I can't imagine doing both. Those hard nights when neither Palmer or I sleep well- I can't even imagine having to go to work the next day. I don't even want to think about how inadequate I would feel if I had to take care of work on top of church, home, family, friends, and my own little family responsibilities. I'm sure that if I had to teach for financial reasons I would make it work (and I know many amazing moms out there who are able to do all of the above plus some) but I thank my Heavenly Father every day for knowing that working might just put me over the top and letting us find a way for me to stay home. Will I ever go back? Possibly. I kept all of my stuff if that means anything. I don't forsee it anytime in the near future but maybe down the road I might get the itching to return. Who knows?